January 19, 2009

conversations with myself

     It's funny how one month of being at home brings back all those uncomfortable feelings you've forgotten about.  How long as it been since I cared about such simple things?  I feel oddly pretentious being at home as compared to when I'm living my second life in New York... as if that is what's normal now.  

     The funny thing is that I am having difficulty coming to terms with that.  I always think of Dallas as my home but strangely it feels as if everything has subtly shifted.  When did I begin to lose focus?  The closest I can come to describing the feeling is comparing it to losing something you've taken for granted-- which is exactly what has happened in this case.  I suppose.

     Say your parents moved your old belongings from your room and you've found yourself in a bed that has suddenly become foreign.  It's the same room and you can point out the places where you used to live and breathe and move, but your things are gone and replaced with decorations marking what was formerly yours as a guest room.  Suddenly, you find yourself always looking.  You find yourself wishing that if only the shadows against your walls or the angle of your blinds were organized in a way you remember, then everything will return to how you once saw... That simply seeing something familiar will take away any uncertainty.  But that won't happen because things change.  People change.  More importantly, you realize that you have changed.  And this is how you got to feeling how you do now... leaving you to the question of where do you belong?  Where is home?  I guess that's something I'll have to figure out in time.

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     Telekinesis, on simpler terms just Michael Benjamin Lerner, hasn't been generating as much buzz as he rightfully deserves.  As with most one man bands, Michael wrote/sang all of his songs on upcoming album Telekinesis! and plays practically all of the instruments included.  It may be interesting to know that Chris Walla is behind the production of this album... Walla of the famed Death Cab for Cutie and who has produced bands along the lines of The Decemberists and Tegan and Sara.  

Retro pop?  Check.  
Michael gives credit to early pop of the 60s and 70s as a major influence in his songwriting.

telekinesis: coast of carolina

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